Stranger: are you gay? You: no more than you Stranger: so you are gay? You: no more than you Stranger: becaue i'm a flaming homosexual You: really? Stranger: yes, oh and i fuck dogs and goldfish in my sparetime Stranger: the catfish fucking hurts You: oh shit, ever fucked your brother? Stranger: no i pushed him down the stairs years ago Stranger: does that count? You: kind of Stranger: my dad raped me when i was young, too bad i dont remember. i wish he did it again before he ran away Stranger: *sigh* You: i feel bad for you You: not Stranger: trolled Your conversational partner has disconnected.
You: Hello Stranger: He's on the train, there isn't much time left. I heard you were one of the best in your fields. You: I have served on three different continents and have had cross-training with BOPE, I may be of some assistence You: What do you need? Stranger: I'm not sure. How do you identify a walrus bite? You: By the crushed remains of body-matter where the walrus landed on you Stranger: Interesting, but this man appears to have been sitting on a walrus when it struck him. You: Sounds like a secret goverment weapon, as far as I know there are no normal walruses that are that agile You: I do not study marine life much so I may be wrong Stranger: The choppers are on the way, should we take any special precautions when airlifting him? You: I strongly recommend having a large quantity of tranqulizer handy, in case he turns into that... thing Stranger: You mean.... Dear God, the chances of that happening are very slim though, no? You: If the subject is exposed to hightend stress-levels it may trigger the chrysalis inside of him, and, as you are a qualified expert in that field, you know what that implies