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Ämnesstartare

Hejsan!

Jag har skrivit en text som jag gärna vill att någon ska korrekturläsa och gärna skriva vad som är fel grammatiskt och övriga synpunkter. Tack[smile]

The British men colonized India thousands of years ago because of its wealth. India had one of the world’s best diamonds, spices, gold and silver, which tempted the British men to settle in India.

When the British men saw that the Indian people were fighting with each other, they took advantage of the situation and controlled India.

The Indian people realized very soon that the British men came to India to take control of the country, and not to help them. The Indians fought for their country, even though the British men won the battle.

Inspiring people like Mahatma Gandhi and Bhagat Singh and many more emphasised the importance of being strong and to not give up. Those people gave the Indian people hope that one day they will win the battle, and they will also het independent.

The British men had controlled the country for almost two hundreds of years. It seems that hard work always pays off, because after two hundreds of years struggling for the country; India became independent on the 15th august 1947.

Ghandi

The prime Minister of India told the country, 30 January 1948, about the assassination of Ghandi. The Indian men and women cried and grieved because of his dead, for Ghandi, one of the most influential men in the world.

Ghandi was not rich and not so good looking either. He was a very clam man who dressed very simple and lived in a simple house. He did not have an army, and did not also use guns or nuclear weapon and similar things. The weapons of truth and non-violence were his weapons. Thus, Ghandi was a very brave man; his willingness to die for his beliefs is one of the factors of the independency of India. His death was an offering for the independency.
Ghandi urged the Indians not to help the British and said that they would go on peace strikes. He was very peaceful. Ghandi walked many miles in silent, and that was because he wanted to protest against British taxes on common items, especially basic foods like rice, salt, that were needed to live. Because of his actions he went to Jail several times, but he continued to struggle for his believes.

Natural resources

The natural resources are land and water. Fifty four percent of the land area is arable, and the groundwater resources are fairly large enough that it is important. The Gangetic Plain is one of India’s most rich regions. Most of India’s wheat and rice are grown here.
The black and read soils of Deccan Plateau (A large plateau in India) are also flourishing. The groundwater resources of the Deccan are considerable but difficult to reach.
Forests are another natural resource for India. 21, 6 percent of the area is covered with woodlands. India has varied climate and the country produce many different forests.

Religion

India is the birthplace of many of the world's religions. Hinduism, Buddhism, Jainism and Sikhism is one of the many religions in India. India also has many places of worship and holy sites of Islam, Christianity and the Jewish faith. India is a land where people of different religions and cultures are free to live in harmony. When in India, you can travel to the holy cities of the different religions and cultures of India. You can witness the celebrations of various festivals in India, where people of different faiths come together in communal harmony. The message of love and brotherhood is expressed by all the religions and cultures of India, which is not so common.

Tribes of India

Many tribes of India are concentrated near the forested areas in country. One of the biggest tribes in India include the Bhils, the Gonds, Khasi, Mishing, Santal, Thakar, Nagas, Mizo and numerous tribes.
Several of the Indian tribes are considered as one of the oldest inhabitants on earth. In fact, according to a few researchers some of the tribes of India actually hold the key to human evolution.

Economy

The GNP of India is very low, therefore the country is considered as a developing country. About half of the population have a low income and they find it very difficult to survive, because one fifth of the population are unemployed, the industries are developing though.

The economy is getting better since the Indians’ learn to use the natural resources in a better way. All cows in the country also contribute to the economy. They contribute with milk, fuel (droppings) and traction force. A growing source of income is tourism. India is famous for spicy food, movies and beautiful nature. There are many beautiful monuments and the country attracts more tourists every year.

Health

2, 6 million or more people in India have HIV (Human Immunodeficiency Virus). The majority of people who have HIV live in six states in India: Tamil Nadu, Andhra Pradesh, and Karnataka in the south, Maharashtra in the west, Manipur and Nagaland in the northeast.

India has a population of one billion, and around half of the adults is sexually active. The first AIDS case in India was detected in 1986; since then HIV infection has been reported in all states and union territories.

Reflection

India’s growing population is like a coin with two opposite faces, which means that the population is growing very fast. I think that the population is too large, because many of the people are to poor. Responsibilities will increase and the unemployment will also increase.

On one hand a large population gives a large of educated, but on the other hand I think it would be much better if the population was not large. Now twenty percent of the population live below the poverty line, and the important thing is that something must be done.

The dead rate and birth rate is not equal. The death rate is much higher. One advantage of the growing population is that the high birth rate prevents the death rate, so maybe in the future the both rates will be very equal. It has been very interesting to explore of India, There are many things that I’ve learnt.

I did not know that that twenty percent of the population live below the poverty line, that was something new. As I said before, this was very interesting country and will maybe travel to India if I get that opportunity.


   
Citera

igen?

Dream:

British men

BARA the British. the British men låter retarderat


   
SvaraCitera
Ämnesstartare

iosib:

igen?

Alltså det andra vara bara ett kladd. =)

iosib:

BARA the British. the British men låter retarderat

Ok, tack. Det ska jag rätta till.[smile]


   
SvaraCitera

Dream:

controlled

Ordval?

Dream:

het independent

Vad är het?

Dream:

two hundreds of years

Two hundred years (När det är tusen, så blir det thousands of years. Antagligen för det är mycket längre än 200 år.

Dream:

two hundreds of years

Onödig upprepning.

Dream:

on the 15th august 1947.

On the 15:th of august

Dream:

told the country, 30 January 1948,

Ordval på told. Konstigt att säga att någon berättade för sitt land om något. Bättre typ "shared the news". Eller något annat, för man talar inte direkt till sitt land. Okej I speak for Greece. Men då representar du Grekland. Man säger inte I talk to France. Eller I'm telling Sweden something.

Dream:

because of his dead,

Because of his death

Dream:

women cried and grieved because of his dead, for Ghandi, one of the most influential men in the world.

Känns konstigt. De grät typ eftersom hans död. Över hans död. Och sen fortsätter meningen Ghandi... They cried and grievde because he was not longer there with them, alternativt, because he had left them (inte bokstavligt) läs:(He left us).

Dream:

He did not

Använd gärna didn't om du inte vill vara super-formell.

Dream:

was not

wasn't

Dream:

weapon

weapon blir weapons i plural.

Dream:

that were needed to live

Okej ris och salt, behöver man. Men meningen blir för "svenskifierad".

Dream:

Jail

liten bokstav, det är inget namn utan substantiv.

Dream:

believes.

beliefs

Dream:

most rich

the richest

Dream:

21, 6

Välj antingen skriva siffror med nummer eller med bokstäver. Blanda inte.

Dream:

India has varied climate

India has a varied climate

Dream:

the country produce many different forests.

The country produces

Dream:

Hinduism, Buddhism, Jainism and Sikhism is one

(they)are one

Dream:

When in India, you can travel to the holy cities of the different religions and cultures of India.

Onödig upprepning av India. Dessutom funderar jag på om det ska bara vara "to holy cities" utan bestämd form.

Dream:

The message of love and brotherhood is expressed

are

Dream:

One of the biggest tribes in India include the Bhils,

includes

Dream:

it

Skriv gärna It med stor bokstav (något min engelsklärare poängterar till mig, i mina uppsatser)

Dream:

About half of the population have a low income and they find it very difficult to survive, because one fifth of the population are unemployed, the industries are developing though.

Dream:

Indians’

Indien eller indierna?

Dream:

and beautiful nature.

and a beautiful nature

Dream:

the country attracts more tourists every year.

ordval på more.

Dream:

2, 6 million or more people

ordval på more.

Dream:

because many of the people are to poor.

too poor. Skulle ha bytt ut because mot since.

Dream:

Responsibilities will increase and the unemployment will also increase.

Upprepning. Känns som du inte kan hitta ett bättre ordval. Responsibilities will increase and also the unemployment. Eller.
Responsibilities and the unemployment will both increase.

Dream:

much better if the population was not large.

upprepning av large, och was not låter retarded. Skriv wasn't här.

Dream:

and the important thing is that something must be done.

The most important thing

Dream:

The dead rate and birth rate is

are

Dream:

I did not know that that twenty percent of the population live below the poverty line, that was something new.

Upprepning på att du inte visste. Inte veta och nytt = samma sak.

Dream:

and will maybe

and I will maybe

Dream:

if I get that

If I get a... opportunity

Jag tycker det är en väldigt bra uppsats. Jag skulle ha gett den MVG. Bra ordförråd. Bra meningsbyggnad. Beskriver bra. Och väldigt få fel. Dessutom en hel del bra idiomatiska uttryck. Allt som jag hittade är egentligen betydelselöst, eftersom på det hela var det väldigt bra. Det var inget major problem. Det har varit svårt att leta efter fel, eftersom dom är så små. Superbra text i vilket fall.


   
SvaraCitera

Dream:

The British men

Det låter efterblivet.

The British Empire låter bättre.


   
SvaraCitera

kan ibnte din lärare se texten här nu och så? :S


   
SvaraCitera

Dream:

, you can travel to the holy cities

travel holy cities?

Dream:

21, 6 percent

21 point 6. borde man inte skriva med punkter när man skriver på eng?

Dream:

and Sikhism is one

are "så många som dom var" eller?

går på högstadiet he he[crazy][crazy][crazy]


   
SvaraCitera
Ämnesstartare

jordgubbsflickan:

.

Jättesnällt av dig. Tack för din hjälp. Känns som att jag måste ge dig något i gengäld, det är jag nog skyldig dig. [smile][love]

NEMO:

kan ibnte din lärare se texten här nu och så? :S

Det är tillåtet att någon korrekurläser innan man lämnar in, så det spelar inte så stor roll. Annars är det väldigt svårt att se vad man själv har gjort för fel när man har läst uppsatsen 100 gånger. Det är bäst då att lämna över den till en kompis och låta denna titta igenom den.[smile]


   
SvaraCitera
Ämnesstartare

passaro:

Det låter efterblivet.

The British Empire låter bättre.

Jo, kanske det. Men om jag skriver både " The british" och "the British Emipire" så är det väl bra, då blir det varierat istället för att använda samma ord hela tiden. [smile]


   
SvaraCitera

Dream:

Jättesnällt av dig. Tack för din hjälp. Känns som att jag måste ge dig något i gengäld, det är jag nog skyldig dig. [smile][love]

Vad snällt sagt. Självklart tar det lite tid att rätta och korrekturläsa, men eftersom jag gillar språket, så tycker jag bara det är roligt. Såvidare man inte ska korrektur läsa 5 st texter i rad. Så jag gör det gärna, då och då. Det var så lite, kom gärna med andra frågor ifall du undrar något. Jag hjälper gärna till. Ha det bra!


   
SvaraCitera

Dream:

Det är tillåtet att någon korrekurläser innan man lämnar in, så det spelar inte så stor roll. Annars är det väldigt svårt att se vad man själv har gjort för fel när man har läst uppsatsen 100 gånger. Det är bäst då att lämna över den till en kompis och låta denna titta igenom den.

ja det är klart egentligen. är väl bara jag som är så rädd för att lägga upp mina texter på nätet. min lärare trodde att jag hade plankat en text en gång liksom, det hade iofs ingenting med nätet att göra men sen dess är ju så sjukt rädd att det ska hända igen. vill bara strypa henne, jag har fan aldrig plankat en text och det var en av de bästa texterna jag skrivit, man bara tack.. jävla cp [mad]

bra text btw:)


   
SvaraCitera

Tråden låst på grund av inaktivitet


   
SvaraCitera